Nov. 23, 2020

They don’t leave. Just hanging around. I guess they feel safe here. Not sure what to do. I really want a car, but I can’t just take one without them knowing. I don’t think they are a threat to me, but I just want to move on. I’ll give them another day or two. If not, I will be on foot again. 

Nov. 20, 2020

Watching these families is making me really miss being home. Not knowing what happened to my family. Not sure if I will ever know what happened to my family. Did they escape like me? Roaming around like me? Are they with each other? Violet on her own? Are they zombies? Eating people? Seeing these kids run and play reminds me of going to the park with Violet and Jack. Jack chasing other dogs around, while Violet played on the swing-set. She loved swinging. “Higher, higher to the clouds” she would always say. One time she surprised me and suddenly jumped off in mid air, and took a hard fall. I thought she broke a leg for sure. I ran over to her as she lied still for a few seconds. Then she just started laughing. I was thinking mom was going to kill me for sure so I was relieved. It was that damn daredevil of a kid that was jumping off next to her. I really wanted to yell at his parents, but I just told Violet she couldn’t do that again or mom wouldn’t let us come back. I’m sure she did it again, but not while I was watching. 

Nov. 14, 2020

Families still here. They are making their way through town, and I am just following them through at a distance. They aren’t leaving much behind for me. Staying locked up at night. Finally saw them light a fire, but nothing like what I have been seeing. Probably just keeping warm. Also see dads walking around with self-made torches keeping a look out. As soon as they leave, I will look for a car. 

Nov. 11, 2020

Can’t get into this town. The families are here. I saw the vans, and backed off. I’m on the outside looking in. Haven’t seen them light a fire yet so I’m wondering if they are doing it. They do seem to be picking up more supplies. They better leave me something. At least they won’t be taking any cars. Again moms are watching the kids closely, and the dads are at work. Haven’t seen the young girl. 

Nov. 7, 2020

What a terrible night. Chips and water didn’t mix well. Got little sleep in between throwing up and nightmares. I dreamt I had a huge birthday party. Family, friends, and people I didn’t even know. It was on a field I think. Somewhere I don’t know. Everyone seemed like they were having a good time. It was time to sing Happy Birthday. People gathered around the biggest cake you could imagine. Mom to my right, dad to my left, and Violet next to him. When the song ended, instead of people clapping, there was a bolt of lightening, and it insistently became dark. I turned and looked at mom, and there it was again. She was a zombie. Not only a zombie, but the lead zombie. She waved her hands, and laughed then everyone transformed. They were all zombies. I had nowhere to go. They knocked the cake off the table, and threw me on top. It was clear they were going to eat me, but I woke up before that could happen. I don’t remember much about the other dreams. No motivation to move on right now. Nor the strength. Looks like another day of just me and my thoughts.

Nov. 6, 2020

Is this a birthday present? People! 2 families it looked like. Family of looters. Stopped and took everything from the car I had. So much for coming back for it. I heard something coming, and hid in the bushes. Watched them as they went through the car. It is not fair, they had 2 cars. 2 vans. One had most of the people, and the other is where they were putting all the supplies they were stealing. It appeared to be 2 moms, 2 dads, 3 younger kids, and a young maybe teenaged girl. Not sure if there was anyone else still in the vans. The kids got out and stretched, while the moms watched them closely. The younger girl didn’t do much. The dads did the stealing. As soon as they were done, they all got back in the vans, and took off. I’m not sure if they were the ones setting the fires, but they have to be. What are the odds of there being anyone else out here? They could be part of a larger group, which is exactly what I am afraid of. They are out in front of me now, so I don’t have to worry about them sneaking up on me. I am going to stay off the road though. Just in case. Now it is time to celebrate my birthday. Stale chips, and nasty lake water. I thought I out grew birthdays, especially in college, but I would love to celebrate it now. A nice vanilla and chocolate cake. I could eat the whole thing myself. 2 or 3 cakes actually. 

Nov. 3, 2020

Decided just to take what I need, and could carry. No way I could push that car. So back on foot it is. At least I got some rest, so I should be able to make it to my next stop without a problem. Could I find two cars in a row? Am I really that lucky? Doubt it. Not sure I’m even lucky being alive. I could be dead and resting in peace. That is if the zombies don’t find me, and snack on me. On the brighter side of things, it is starting to get cooler outside. I am going to need to find some clothes. Maybe something warmer which is usually a pain to carry around. Too warm to wear it in the daytime, but need it at night. It is so nice and cold at night that I just want to sleep forever. Can’t because the dreams, and my internal alarm waking me up to check if everything is ok, I don’t sleep too much at one time. I really need to find a better way t

Nov. 1, 2020

I think I got the most out of that car. Came up just short of this town. I was really hoping to make it because I have all these supplies with me. Thinking about pushing the car the rest of the way, but I’m not sure it is worth it. Don’t think I have the strength or energy for that either. Decisions decisions.